For a lot of people, being truly vulnerable and letting someone into your life is one of the most difficult things to do. Allowing someone to truly know and see you can be exhilarating, but also terrifying. However, avoiding vulnerability with those you love is a disservice to yourself.
It is a scientific fact that strong, healthy relationships increase your overall quality of life. Without emotional vulnerability, it is very difficult to have such a strong relationship. Rather than avoiding vulnerability, be open to moving toward it and embracing it.
This can be scary, so let’s look at some ways you can practice this.
What is vulnerability?
At its core, vulnerability is the risk of emotional exposure. It is laying your thoughts and feelings bare to another person. Romantic relationships are not the only type of relationship to involve vulnerability. It is the basis of many platonic relationships as well.
Vulnerability is what allows us to connect on a deep, emotional level with someone else. It’s difficult to form connections with a wall between you and the person you are in a relationship with.
Steps you can take to be more vulnerable
Forcing yourself to be more vulnerable before you are ready is not the key to success. Rather, I recommend you ease yourself into being emotionally vulnerable by practicing.
Try not to fear failure
Of course, this is much easier said than done. But, when you remove the fear of shame from failure, you allow yourself to experience things you previously had never dreamed of. The only thing that can truly prevent failure is not trying, and it is much better to try and fail than to never know at all. Let yourself fail! It gets easier with time.
Share your hardships
Part of practicing vulnerability is allowing others to confide in you. If you are presenting a perfect facade to other people in your life, it may intimidate other people from wanting to dissect their troubles with you. Vocalizing mistakes you have made in your life or difficulties you may be facing not only makes you less intimidating, it allows you to normalize failure, or at the very least, imperfection.
Own your mistakes and apologize
Getting into an argument with someone you love can feel catastrophic, especially if you feel like you are in the right. Taking the time to break the ice first and apologize–even if you did not start the argument–shows that whatever bond you have with the other person is much more important than a fight.
Additionally, be sure to own up to your mistakes if you make them. Allowing yourself to admit your faults really breaks down barriers and lets other people see you more clearly.
Vocalize your wants and needs
As convenient as it would be, the people in our lives cannot read our minds. Instead of stewing in anger over what was not said or done by someone else, let the person in your life know what you want or need in an emotional moment. Vocalizing your thoughts is not a weakness, but a strength that takes many people a long time to figure out.
The act of being vulnerable can take time and practice. Although it may not come naturally, I promise you that it does get easier. If you are struggling to let people into your life, I suggest you look into therapy. This is a great way to help break down barriers and find out what is really causing your emotional blocks.
Feel free to schedule an appointment with me today. I look forward to walking the road of emotional freedom with you.
For more information on anxiety therapy that can help with struggles to be vulnerable, check out the link!